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The Kickabout with Johnny Vaughan 11am - 1pm
19 March 2018, 07:00 | Updated: 19 March 2018, 14:20
Let’s have a look at some of the silliest accents that have crept across the silver screen. Shame on you, Hollywood actors!
Old Nic’s dad had Italian blood, being part of the Coppola family of Francis Ford/Godfather fame, so you’d think he could do a convincing Italian accent? Think again.
There’s something about the legend of Robin Hood that seems to fox non-British actors - namely, that the whole thing is set in Nottingham. New Zealand-born, Australia-raised Crowe sounds like a Jon Culshaw impersonation in this clip.
A husband-and-wife clanger here, with New Yorker Tom and Honolulu via Sydneysider Nicole having trouble finding their Irish roots somewhat.
The ultimate Bad Accent: Missouri-born actor and comedian plays a Cockney chimney-sweep from the turn of the 20th century with varying degrees of success. To be fair, it’s meant to be a fantasy, so if you have a problem with the realism of Dick’s accent, where do you stand on the flying nanny?
“Fank yoo. What abaht baby Alice, are you sure she’s awright?” “Yeah, she’s awright. We’ll get her ahhht.” No, not a scene from EastEnders last week, but a moment from the 2001 adaptation of Alan Moore’s Jack The Ripper graphic novel. This is what Victorian London was ACTUALLY like. Honest.
The totally bodacious Keanu starts as the unfortunate Jonathan Harker in Francis Ford Coppola (see above)’s version of the horror classic. As Reeves was fresh off his success with Bill And Ted’s Bogus Journey, some said he was miscast. We say: it’s a classic comedy performance.
Underwhelming rom-com set in Britain where Brooklyn-born Hathaway plays a character from Yorkshire - well, that’s what it says here. Yorkshire? Lancashire? Generic Northern? YOU decide.
Just to prove this is not just a case of having a pop at hapless American actors, here’s Maurice Micklewhite himself playing a corporate bad buy in this brainless Steven Segal actioner. We THINK he’s meant to be American - we’re not quite sure. “It was my worst professional experience ever,” Caine later said.
Bradley Pitts plays an IRA terrorist up against a US cop played by Harrison Ford. His accent is firmly set to “leprechaun”.
Robinhood (all one word) again. Californian Costner struggles to make the Nottinghamshire folk hero three-dimensional. And fails. Altogether now: “Everything I dooooo…”